Grendel, my own deeper understanding...

The final chapters of Grendel… a finally ending novel or one to remember? Most students, if not most people, enjoy books and stories that they choose to read casually or for fun. Because most of the books that I have read were school assignments, I cannot say that I have ever had any favorite books except Calvin and Hobbs and maybe Captain Underpants. Despite my lack of passion in reading novels, Grendel has become one that has influenced me in a larger way than any other.
Throughout the novel, Grendel becomes more “mature” through his experiences and observations. Initially, Grendel fears man because he discovers another ‘thing’ that can think rationally and act based off its thoughts. Such a similar trait with Grendel could only take him by surprise. However, later on, Grendel becomes “cursed” with the dragon’s charm. Grendel is invulnerable to any weapon and no longer fears man’s power. Although he still is intimidated by Hrothgar and the Shaper, Grendel calls himself the “Wrecker of Hrothgar” and begins to torture the people. This stage is where Grendel finally understands his purpose in life and what he can commit to the world. Before, he was only an infant mentally, calling for his mother when he was being tortured by Hrothgar’s men. After this rebirth Grendel can no longer depend on any one else shown even through the conversation with the dragon. Even though he went to the dragon for knowledge, he ended up not gaining anything except the fact that the dragon is extremely protective over his belongings. To this point in the novel, Grendel reminded me of my own life.
I was confused, not knowing my purpose in the world. When I entered middle school and high school, I was tortured by other students due to my Korean ethnicity. Ranging from communism in North Korea to the Virginia Tech attack, I was continually made fun of my race. Eventually, I received my own charm and their comments could no longer cut through my skin; I was immortal. When I was trying to understand my place in the world, I also observed life with great intensity trying to learn from others and their actions. Many whom I went to for a deeper understanding or knowledge of life acted similar to the dragon, only obsessed with their own problems or treasures in life. In the end, I felt as I had died, lost to the world still looking for an answer.
Mrs. Clinch, I hope this is not too off topic, but this my response to Grendel and how I was affected by it. I could not help but compare myself and see the similarities between us. I believe that there is a monster in all of us and we mature (still as a monster) just to either hide the monster side or be consumed by it.